1 - Indecision is the key to flexibility. 2 - You cannot tell which way the train went by looking at the track. 3 - There is absolutely no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation. 4 - Happiness is merely the remission of pain. 5 - Nostalgia isn't what it used to be. 6 - Sometimes too much drink is not enough. 7 - The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant. 8 - The careful application of terror is also a form of communication. 9 - Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world. 10 - Things are more like they are today than they ever have been before. 11 - Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for. 12 - Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler. ...

Hey, take the time to do this, and DON'T scroll down until you follow the instructions! Do it, it's pretty interesting.      A man (M) and a lady (L) who are very much in love, and devoted to one      another are separated by a river with no way of getting across to the      other side.  On L's side of the river, there is a boatman (B) who is      able to take her over to the other side of the river but refuses to do      so unless she pays him a price of $20, twice his normal fare.      L has no money.  Another man (S) then tells L that he will giver her      $20 if she sleeps with him.  L agrees to do so and on receiving the $20,      pays B who takes her over to the other side of the river.  She is reunited ...

Supposedly these rules were part of a speech Mr. Gates was giving to a high school graduating class.  I highly doubt that, but they’re still funny and relevant even though I’ve had this email for at least ten years now. Rule 1: Life is not fair – get used to it.   Rule 2: The world won’t care about your self-esteem.  The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.   Rule 3: You will NOT make forty thousand dollars a year right out of high school.  You won’t be a vice president with a car phone, until you earn both.   Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.  He doesn’t have tenure.   Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity.  Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping.  They ...

I received a card during some customer service training seminar or other that I took in the 90's, and for some reason that card has been following me around in my piles of crap for something like 12 years.  So today I'm going to transcribe it here and then burn it, so it can no longer haunt me.   Words to Avoid For Extraordinary Customer Relations   (controlling words) have to I need (want) you to ... You need to ... What's your problem? I can't/you can't Would you mind ... ? I'll try I'm sorry It's just a ... best/worst but required / necessary should / ought to must policy jargon       Words to Use For Extraordinary Customer Relations   Are you willing? Will you? What have you considered? What are the options? Which do you prefer? What are the alternatives? How can it be corrected? How can I help? What do you want me to do? Here are some options I made a mistake I understand I understand you concern I apologize for (specific) however will / willing able unable   Oh look, there is a little copyright statement.  So ... the above is taken from a card copyright 1988 Kaset International, Tampa FL.  I didn't write it, except for the opening blurb.  I have found that many of these words ...

Seriously .. check it out:  http://www.cjhl.org/sites/3333/page.asp?Site=9963&LeagueID=9963&SeasonID=33&DivisionID=29&page=Players&TeamID=49&PlayerID=4052&Section=Home I wonder what the odds are of there not only being another Brad Lazaruk anywhere, but in Alberta.  Only a few hundred kilometres from here.